February 1, 2011 (Tuesday)
Welcome February 1! It’s the Love Month!
Are you still single? In a relationship but complicated and wanted to break free? Committed but ready to mingle? Where is the Love?
You may find it difficult to cope with your loneliness? Wish to fall in love but is too confused how to proceed? Well, here are simple steps that can help you find Mr or Miss Perfect.
Admit That You Need Love
The best cure of loneliness is love but only if you are realistic enough to admit that you are lonely and that, you indeed need love. This is where most are found wanting and the best way to get around this is to view love as a necessity rather than as luxury, which also ensures you have realistic expectations of love.
If you think you don’t have the ability to love openly, freely and fully, seek help. And for this, you can turn to anybody you think can be of help to you, like a friend, someone from your family, counselor or a spiritual leader. Sharing your problem with someone else not only makes the problem real, it also eases some of its burden off you.
Try to make amends with all your past or present accomplices with whom you may have shared a romantic relationship but have not been able to live up to the expectations. Accepting the fact that you have hurt your lovers in the past is an act of accepting responsibility for your deeds. This will make you humble, which is what is needed the most for falling in love again.
Ability To Love
You have to be aware of how loving you are or whether you are caring and kind to others you come across in your life, as this might be the exact problem if you are dating somebody but is unable to fall in love. The rules are simple; you should have the ability to love generally if you wish to love specifically.
Give dating a break, probably for a month or two before you decide to begin the entire process afresh. Distance yourself both emotionally and physically with persons of the opposite sex until you feel the urge for intimacy once again. And when you have started to date again, make sure you stick to a two-date rule. This way, you’ll ensure you are able to give everyone a fair chance.
Keep Your Options Open
Widen your options by opening yourself to those you think is just good enough for you, instead of doing business with those you think is perfect. By dating people whom you otherwise wouldn’t have, you are actually increasing your possibilities.
Make your commitment first as this often brings to the fore your best qualities. For this, three or four dates should be enough. And when you have decided to remain loyal to this one person, love starts to bloom.
Don’t Think About Sex
Refrain from engaging in casual acts of sex, as it won’t bring you closer to the person contrary to what most think. Since sex involves our strongest impulses and deepest desires, meaningless sex can in fact, drain us of our emotions. Also, it can work to create more problems than solving some.
The Right Person
Stop wasting your time by dating those who you think suffer from fear of committing themselves. Instead, find yourself someone who may make a better match.
Do Not Compare
Free your mind of all the clutter of your past so that there is no past issues that should be worrying you at present. Also, never compare your present date with previous dates. Instead, you should be aware that each person has their own unique qualities and deserves respect for it.
Try to reach deeper with the person whom you are dating instead of skimming on the surface. Also, you should act in a way that can add to your depth. Like going for deeper conversations on your dates that will be of interest both to you and our date.
And lastly, love others to get loved. Think of your friends who are lonely and devise plans as to how you can help them find their love interest. This way, the more you spread love, the greater is the chances of love streaming in to your life.
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